Carpe Diem

Death is always sudden.

Those are the words I heard today during the funeral mass of one of our beloved missionaries. We are never ready for death, be it our own or someone else’s. Its always sudden.

Although we weren’t that close, I found that the funeral made me take a second look at my life and what I am doing with mine. Am I doing what I want to do? Am I happy? Are there things that I have put on hold to do later? Or are my fears and insecurities stopping me from pursuing those things?

Bottom line, it reminded me that life is short.

Oh Canada!

When the plane landed in YYZ, there was something so satisfying in being on Canadian soil again. I felt so patriotic and proud to be Canadian. The strange thing was that even though I was relieved to be home, the Canada I left in August 2014 seemed very different to the Canada I came back to a couple weeks ago.

A couple of things I noticed immediately:

1. There are so many white people everywhere. Even the Indians and ethnic people are white. But I guess that’s what happens during winter, people just hibernate.
2. The concrete. Yes, I’ve missed sidewalks and nicely paved roads, but are three overpasses on top of each other necessary? I swear, I was kind of in shock.
3. Bush. What happened to the wildlife? Why are those hedges shaped like squares? And those trees on the street are so perfectly placed in a straight line. Gosh, did urban planning always look this sterile? – its unnatural.

Talk about culture shock. However, let’s be honest here, Canada probably didn’t change that much while I was gone (other than Alberta becoming NDP) – it was me who changed.

Entering into the Mystery of God

In life we all desire to know and to be known; to understand and be understood; to love and be loved. At this point in my life I desire to understand and to be understood – to continue to make sense of the new environment I am in. To better understand the people I work with, to understand why I do the things I do, and to understand God in my life.

I was listening to a talk recently by Richard Rohr, who btw I think is so profound. He was talking about our need as humans to exercise control in our lives. This could be through controlling the people around us, by excessively planning our lives, or by seeking to understand the things around us. When he mentioned understanding, he had my complete attention. He relates it to how we are able to feel safe, secure, or superior when we are able to make sense of why things happened the way they did. Like finding a reason in why you were late to work, or why you took a different running route that day, or which church you ended up going to. By seeking to understand why things unfold in our lives the way they do, it allows us to feel like we have everything under control and that we understand the events that make up our lives. The, “I got this”, mentality.

Mission: Serving the Universal Church

Photo above: Me working at the boy’s orphanage

Wow. I am always surprised at what and how much I can accomplish when I have a deadline to meet. I’ve been awake since 4am working on this and I finished just before 9, which includes editing and peer editing on skype haha. Not too shabby if I do say so myself. I wrote the article below to be published in the BC Catholic newspaper. Ashley was distraught when she found out that she had to write in third person, but found it quite refreshing to be removed from her thoughts by the end of it. Anyways, I think this post is quite fitting especially in light of the daily readings this week. Where is God calling you?

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“Mission is for everyone”, said Beverly Trach, a Scarboro lay-missionary since 2003. “As Catholics we all need to identify ourselves as being missionary”. Scarboro Foreign Missions is inviting all those 21 years and older who have a desire to serve and build up the Kingdom of God to apply for their one year lay missionary program. Applications are due February 13 and more information on the program can be found at www.scarboromissions.ca.

I am a foreign lay missionary!

So, what are you doing after you graduate? A phrase that has haunted me this past year as friends and family asked me this seemingly harmless, yet burdening question.

Yes, yes, you read it in the title. I am officially a foreign lay missionary with Scarboro Foreign Missions. And foreign doesn’t mean that I am foreign, although technically I am, it means that I will be an expat in a country other than Canada. You may have heard me say that I am volunteering abroad, or I’m doing an overseas mission, etc, but regardless of semantics it’s pretty much all the same thing. So in a couple of weeks I will say goodbye to Canada and will be living in Guyana (the one in South America NOT Africa, which is Ghana) for the next 9 months.

So why are you doing all of this? Don’t you want to settle down, be financially secure, be stable? Of course I want all of those things, but my desire to serve God is greater.

It brings me back to the saying, you could have everything in the world, but if you are not happy with who you are, all of those things don’t mean anything. It is the inner state of who you are that determines your outlook and perception on life. But in all honesty, the best things in life are free: love, laughter, faith and beauty. So in a way, I am embarking on this new and exciting adventure to learn more about myself by rediscovering what my passions are and what gifts I have to serve the world. I believe that the more we know ourselves, the more we know about God who dwells in us

I guess that leads me to another question I’ve been asked. Why be a missionary in Guyana when Canada is a mission field on its own accord? Why leave when there is work to be done at home? The way that I see it is that I am able to be a bridge between Canada and Guyana.

One of my favorite things that I learned during formation was that the Gospel is incarnate in culture. So by immersing myself in a different culture, I will be able to experience a different “face” of God through the ways they pray, worship, and serve Jesus. My hope is that I may stand as a reminder for those I leave behind in Canada and those who I encounter in Guyana that the kingdom of God transcends race, culture, and religion. That love transcends ALL things.

As I become transformed in this process and I learn more about myself and God, I invite you to join me. The Catholic Church is a universal body of people and as a foreign lay missionary I seek to know, understand, and love the universal church.

He died for me and so now I live for Him.